Monday, June 3, 2013

Student Conversations...

I have a fan page on Facebook (for my English Teacher in China persona). I've been posting random little conversations and things.
I'm not sure what will happen to ye olde fan page when I return to better cheese. I mean America.

I don't want to lose those and paste, ENGAGE!

Me: What did you do this week that made you happy?
Student: Homework.
Me: That made you happy?
Student: No. There is no happy.
Me: This country is depressing.
Student: What means?


Me: What is the setting?
Student: He home.
Me: His home.
Student: His he home.
Student: Then where is he home?
Me: You have a pronoun problem. 
Student: I not understand.
Me: I can tell.


Student: How old are you?
Me: *sigh* How old do you think I am?
Student: Are you 43?
........................and that, Ladies and Gentlemen, is why I died a little inside. Send in the clowns.

Student: Leah. I love you. (pause) LEAH. I LOVE YOU. (pause)

Me: Andy, I love you too. Claire and I are talking.
Me: Why?
Student: No why. I don't love you now.
Me: Because........whatever. Go sit down.


I asked the students to give me sentences with adverbs. This is what I got:
My dad's run is quickly.
My dad's work is loudly.
I is play outside.
I can swim is slowly.
My mom is quickly.
Leah talk is loudly.
I'm trying to figure out why these kids want to put 'is' in EVERY sentence.......


Me: What do you like to eat?
Student: Ice tream and hamborgder.
Me: That was so cute! I almost don't want to correct you.
Student: (giggles) Ting bu dong. (Don't understand.)
Me: What is your name?
Student: I am name is Emily.
Me: You are so wrong and SO CUTE!

Me: What's the weather like today?
Emily: Today is sunny day. [Ballerina arms in my face]
Me: Do you like sunny days?
Emily: [Frantic ballerina arms] Yes! Sunny day I is eat ice tream!
Me: You are KILLING me, Smalls!
Emily: [Stops flailing] Am name Emily.

Me: The bear likes to eat in the dining room. See the bear in the dining room? Where do you eat?
Student: Hamburger.
Me: Not what. Where do you eat.
Student: I like hamburger.
Me: WHERE! Three years, Tom. Three years of English. How...
Student: No. I see one bear. I see one cat.

Emily: Do you like my two tress? It have dreen butterfies.
Me: Do you mean cool dress? Your cool dress?
Emily: Yes. Two tress.
Me: *sigh* With green butterflies? What sound does G make? Green.....
Emily: Well, a little bit dreen and a little bit boo.

Student: Are you a penguin?
Me: Why? Oh. Because I'm wearing black and white?
Student: Because you are fat.
Me: First, that is rude. Second, penguins aren't......whatever. Is your mom here yet? Go home.

Me: Hello, Emily. How are you?
Emily: Not otay.
Me: Why?
Emily: Today is no ice tream.
Me: I'm so sorry. Why?
Emily: (looks sadly at the floor for a minute) I don't know.

Student: (singing) The stars of your love remind me of bus.
Me: Bus?
Student: What?
Me: I like your version.
Student: What?
Me: Nothing.

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