Monday, August 20, 2012

You know I like RANDOM

Random stories and thoughts......

Yesterday I saw a man riding a bike. He wasn't wearing a shirt, his
pants were way too big and full of holes. He had no shoes, but that
isn't the part that made me stop in the middle of the road: He had no
arms. He was leaning over the handlebars and steering with his chest.

Does anyone understand what Sly Stalone says? Ever? He needs
subtitles. Is that a job? Someone should have that job.

I started watching "The Expendables" online last night. That's what
made me think about RockyRambo. I don't normally spend time thinking
about Mr. Stalone. But, seriously, he is the king of mumbling.
Anyway, I couldn't finish the movie. When it got to the point where it
seemed like RockyRambo was going to have a love interest...and he
might be kissing someone....I realized that I couldn't finish
watching. I realized that the thought of watching him kiss someone was
the stuff of nightmares. Have I developed a new fear?

The school got a new secretary two months ago. She wears stripper
shoes to work. Today, she is so high off the ground....she can't walk
in a straight line. I must be tired, or something, because it super
funny.

My school is on the 28th floor of this business building. We are the
entire top floor. There is a hotel behind us that you can see from
some of the classrooms. The hotel caught on fire this morning. I've
been watching the firemen......stand around the fire and chat with
each other. I'm hoping they are at least talking about the fire.
Cause....they don't seem to be doing much else. I mean, they brought a
hose. So, they got started. I think.

I went to have lunch the other day......oh, it was SO GOOD! Rice,
eggs, tomatoes, a side of potatoes, and fantastic spices. It was
perfect. Almost.
I was sitting at a table just outside on the sidewalk. Right next to
my table was a big glass thing, like a fish tank, belonging to the
store next door. A TANK FILLED WITH BOILED CHICKEN HEADS. So, as long
as I didn't look to my right....lunch was perfect. :)

I miss chocolate. I don't know where the Chinese got their
chocolate.....and I don't know who told them it WAS chocolate.
Somebody lied.

I've had parts of "Funky Cold Medina" stuck in my head for two days.

The other night...I couldn't sleep. That happens a lot here. This kind
of non sleeping would have been awesome when I had graveyard shifts
back in ye ol' college.
So, around 6am....I got super-holy-crap-amazingly bored. And what did
I do? Why, I cut my own hair. CAUSE I'M LEAH. That's how I roll.
Bad news, kids: Kitchen scissors in China......not so great for hair cutting.
Good news, kids: No one but me seems to notice that I messed up. Cause
most hairstyles in China....well, let's just say......no. Let us not
say. Let us not be rude.

1 comment:

Tiffani said...

I love all of this and promise to have chocolate waiting for you when you return......in Europe.....delicious European Chocolate.......in 2014